I used to think that when I felt resentment, the sole reason was that I wasn’t speaking up for myself. For example, it can be a friend that only calls when they need something but is not around to reciprocate or a co-worker who constantly crosses my boundaries. I let them get away with behavior that is not ok with me and usually drives me plain batty! Then I kick myself for not speaking up and hear the voice in my head say things like “I don’t want to hurt their feelings.” or ” I don’t know HOW to tell them.” I am worth the time and effort to figure it out and speak my truth! I have many friends who can and do hear me speak up and still love me for it. In truth, they hold me to do it.

It comes around again when I start expecting things from people that they are just NOT capable of. The big hint comes when I hear myself saying “should” either out loud to another person or in my thinking toward that person. “They should know better, They should do their research, They should take action.” I posted on my facebook wall about expecting a snail to act like a lion. It looks like a snail. It’s always acted like a snail. There’s a big honkin’ slime trail behind it. Why in the WORLD would I be expecting actions of a lion from that?

So I ask you to check in with yourself. Are YOU holding resentment towards someone or something? Now ask yourself if you need to either speak up or if you are expecting something that cannot be given.

Photo by eliduke